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A Supporting Role

In a wedding, our families play a supporting role in one of the most important days of their lives. You can see it in the Mother of the groom, shown in this picture. As happy as she looks, I feel as if she is keeping her distance. I think it’s the way she is small and isolated in the picture and the way her hand reaches out in a reserved way. She greets him from far away, knowing that her role in his life has shifted. She was once the center of his life, but today she is happy to be a witness to his story.

I remember at the end of my wedding day I surprised my mother to a first dance. She had been hands off in the planning of my wedding, which I knew was hard for her because she is a very opinionated person. But in that moment, under the warm hanging lights, I thanked her for allowing us to have the wedding of our dreams. She whispered in my ears and told me she just wanted me to be happy. I will never forget that moment.


How do you grasp the love a Father has for his child? I look at the father in this picture and the way he kisses his daughter. The way he over-kisses her little face, the way his hand is barely touching hers, and the way she accepts it with a lack of awareness that comes with her age. All she knows is his scratchy face. I think this is what tenderness is.

The girl is yet able to grasp how much her father loves her —but she will.


Fathers have a strong but quiet presence in our lives. They speak when they need to and are always ready to jump in to protect their child. That doesn’t change no matter where we go or who we marry. We want affirmation that we have chosen well, that we have chosen correctly. We look to our father, but we’re only able to guess what he’s thinking.

My father is always the heart of the family. No matter what I’m going through or what situation i’m in, he will come through and choose to be there for me, even when it’s not what he wants.

confronting unspoken feelings

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